Alternate Earth, Circa 2017
“If we take one more case about spying on cheating spouses, I’m quitting!”
“Easy, Doctor Dark, there are reasons why we take those cases. They pay well, and we have certain expenses…like rent and food, that we must met,” Mr. Moore explained.
“Well, I’m sick of them. Can’t we work with Scotland Yard?”
“We could, I imagine, if they wanted us. But they don’t.”
“And, why not?”
“For two reasons; the first is your background – you’ve been arrested numerous times for public drunkenness you sot. That doesn’t set too well with those blokes. The second reason is they don’t even pay as much as our “domestic” cases do.”
“Damn,” Doctor Dark uttered in a subdued voice.
“Chin up old boy, I may be onto something big. Our contact in Scotland Yard said there’s a murderer roaming the streets of London who has easily eluded authorities for three months now.”
“How’s that? I’ve seen nothing about a serial killer on the news?”
“Apparently, he’s so clever that he makes each murder look like the victim died from an accident, or by natural causes. It was a stroke of pure luck that the authorities even found out about the Mastermind Killer.”
“Mastermind Killer. Quite a sobriquet for a cold-blooded murderer,” Doctor Dark observed.
“Quite so. I have a summary of the murders, dates, times, locations, and detectives notes here,” Mr. Moore said, as he handed a thick file to Doctor Dark.
The two would-be criminal sleuths spent all of their spare time investigating the Mastermind Killer. Days turned to weeks, as they tirelessly roamed the city streets at all hours.
Finally, there was a breakthrough.
They witnessed a cloaked figure purposely throw a woman over a balcony. One moment the two were standing on the balcony of the five-story apartment complex across the street; the next, the woman was silently falling to her death, making a sickening thud on the cobblestones.
The killer wasn’t aware of them, as they lingered in the shadows watching him. Minutes later a cloaked figure came out of the apartment complex and started walking towards them.
At the last moment they jumped out and tackled the tall figure. Then something strange happened. As Mr. Moore pulled on the cloak in an attempt to get a better grip, it gave way and revealed an alien being!
Despite their shock, both men used their combined weight to hold the alien down. It’s pupiless black eyes blinked in anger and surprise. It’s skin was translucent, showing a complex network of veins and odd-looking internal organs.
“Blinking hell! Mr. Moore! What are we going to do with this thing?”
“Hold on…I’m going to put handcuffs on it.”
Once that was accomplished, they stood the alien up and duck-walked him to their van. It was an old modified paddy wagon that still had one bench seat, and a set of shackles wielded into the side behind it.
Doctor Dark sat directly across from the alien on the salvaged back seat of a 1960 Cadillac they bought in a rummage sale.
“We’ll interrogate this bloke when we get home,” Mr. Moore said, as he pulled out onto the street and accelerated.
Once inside the house they took the handcuffed alien down to the basement and hooked him up to a device around his thin neck that looked like a bark collar for yappy mutts.
“Cheerio! Time to use your translation software Doctor.”
A bank of computers suddenly came alive behind Doctor Dark. He adjusted some dials, pushed a couple of buttons, and turned the speaker system on.
“What’s your name?” he asked.
“Kiss my tushie!” the alien rudely replied.
“Now there! There’ll be none of that. You see those metal rings on your ankles? I can flip a switch…like this (the alien screeched in pain) or you can be civil.”
Tears ran down the alien’s black eyes and it stuttered a response, “Whatever you say master.”
“Why are you running around killing humans? Shouldn’t you be in space somewhere?”
“I was a stowaway on the Martian Cruise Ship that offers tours of the planets in the Milky Way. The passengers were allowed to step outside the ship, according to international protocols, for ten minutes to experience your atmosphere.
“Just my luck that one of the crew members checked the baggage hold where I was hiding. I managed to get past him and ran outside. I didn’t stop running until I found this place.”
So that doesn’t tell use why you’re going around killing people,” Mr. Moore said.
“It’s all I know,” the alien explained. “I’m wanted on three planets for multiple murders. What else was I going to do?”
“This won’t do at all! Doctor, throw that switch again, and let’s see how long it takes to electocute this monster!”
The next day.
“It’s not my fault that the body melted into a bloody mess,” Doctor Dark contended.
“No one is going to believe us now. We could have been famous.” Mr. Moore moaned.
As It Stands, my sorry slueths may be back again some day.